The first of two e-mail messages on 1/7/10, this one received at 2:41 pm EST:
Hello friends and family!
The internet is working tonight, and I have time to write to you, so I'm thanking God for answering those prayers. The past few days have been so very busy here in Belarus - nonstop activity with 4 girls staying with us and constant activities for us to do. Yet, even though the slight break from activity tonight is nice, the quietness in the house tonight is deafening as it is so evident that the girls are no longer with us since they went back to their "homes" yesterday. Their smiles and laughter are missed so much by Rich, Joe and I tonight...
But, now let me step back in time to three days ago when we had the excitement of visiting the deaf village. On Jan. 4th, our day began with meatballs & chicken broth, eggs, and mashed potatoes for breakfast! A heavier meal than any of us are used to, but since we are learning quickly while here that we often do not get time to eat lunch, we know we need to eat what we can in the morning so we can make it to dinner time! We left around 11 am to head over to the deaf "village" (as it had been described to us). In reality however, it wasn't really a village but a set of buildings where many deaf people lived and worked. The first building we went into was the "enterprise" building (the administration building & factory) where the deaf people worked. The deaf people are organized into various associations, of which this "village" we went to is one of them. The association provides for all their needs and is run by the government. It provides the deaf with a job, a "home", and a place of entertainment. The jobs that are given to the deaf people are very simple jobs that require very little knowledge...they are trained to do one skill, and they do that one thing over and over and over. The factory we were in was making window handles and hinges...there were some machines, but the people were doing much of the work by hand also. We got to tour the factory which was very dirty (but that's probably normal even for a factory in the United States) and very cold - Rich's thermometer registered just 50 degrees! They also have other types of manual activities such as sewing that they will have the deaf people do. The tour was interesting. Joe was quite the celebrity - certainly the only deaf American any of these deaf people ever met before. They stopped working to come talk to him and the people who were there supervisors wanted to take so many pictures of Joe talking with them. For that matter, the association directors and administration said we were the first Americans they had ever met also, and they too had us stand with them and took many pictures.
After the factory, we went to the apartment building. Wow - what a shock...we walked in on the ground floor to a sparse concrete "lobby" area with no decorations. We headed up the stairwell - uneven concrete steps, dirty walls, overall filth. But it only got worse...the further up we went the more intense was the smell that permeated the building. After going up a few floors we were led into a small room - probably not more than 8 ft. x 10 ft. - which was packed with women and children. All the children there were deaf except for one. The mothers had heard that a group of Americans were coming to visit, and these Americans wanted to help their children. Obviously they desire our assistance. The children ranged in age from 1 1/2 years old to 12 years old. Absolutely adorable children - each one of them. The room was so full of people you could hardly move. Fortunately we had brought along a bag of matchbox cars, some kaleidoscopes and a baby rattle. We asked some of the mamas to wait out in the hall and Rich got out the camera and video camera. We started videoing each child, writing down their name and age. Then each little boy got a car and the girls got the kaleidoscopes. The smallest child got the baby rattle. Some of the children were shy, others were so excited to see us and get a toy. Most were probably wearing their best clothes, and those were not good - fairly old and dingy. Some of the children smelled bad - but that is nothing unusual in Belarus. I was able to convince even some of the shyest children to let me hold them while Rich filmed them, which was just wonderful. I loved being able to hold and hug these little ones who have so little. It was amazing how their eyes sparkled when we handed them a little toy. We learned that all the children we saw that day had at least a mama or papa - perhaps both. They all lived in the association building. When the children are 3 years old, their parents can begin sending them to a "daycare" school where they live. The children only come home 4 times a year - for summer break, one week in the spring & fall, and for the holiday over New Years (probably about 2 weeks). The adults talked about how difficult it was for them to send their children away to school and not be able to see them for such a long time. I can only imagine. We were told that the government gives them hearing aids for the children, but I'm not sure the hearing aids really work well for the children or are suited to their individual needs. Krystina and the other girls with us were wonderful with the children too - talked to them and gave them lots of hugs. I wanted so badly to take the kids away from that place to give them a better life - their mothers looked so sad the entire time - so depressed, defeated - totally hopeless. Their babies are just children like those in America, but born in a country where there is so little hope, so little future for them. They are just little ones growing up in filth...it's so sad.
After taking the children’s pictures and giving them toys we were invited to go into one of the mother's apartments for tea and a snack. We went up the stairs to another floor and entered a VERY small apartment - three rooms - one a mini kitchen which only had a small refrigerator - no stove - and 2 small bedrooms/living areas. A table had been put in the one room and that was where we sat. We had a good conversation with the director and the other association worker there about the facility and their needs. They seemed sincerely interested in having us bring the deaf children to America with the ABRO program this summer. They told us they had a total of 13 deaf children that lived in the building, 100 deaf adults. Apparently a German group has helped them some in the past, but that group will only take hearing children, so the deaf children have never had an opportunity to have assistance similar to what we are offering through the ABRO program. The woman who hosted us in her apartment was partially deaf and had a speech impairment we were told. She had 2 hearing sons - one was older but the 2nd one was 12 years old. He has a physical disability - apparently he has club feet and has had 2 surgeries so far for them. The mother was so gracious to us, and obviously was trying very hard to get us to take her son to America this summer. After eating she asked us to take so many pictures of her son with us. Then they even had us take pictures of a little dog they had! :) That was kind of funny. After eating there, we had a better "tour" of the apartment building. For every 4 "apartments" there is one kitchen which is shared. The kitchens were horrible - one rusted, very old stove, one or two sinks that looked like they were about ready to fall off the wall and a small refrigerator. There was one table in the kitchen too. It smelled horrendous and was filthy again. We went up to another floor in the apartment, and the smell on that floor was even worse - made us want to gag. Again the apartments all shared a kitchen and on this floor we saw a "laundry room" which was basically a dirty concrete hole with 2 regular sized sinks hanging on the wall. Laundry was hung over the pipes on the ceiling. No washing machine or dryer at all. We never did see the bathroom in the apartments, but I can only imagine how bad those must have been too. I'm sure that was the source of some of the smell in the building.
Next we went to the "club". This was the best building of them all at the deaf facility. They have a library, sewing room, art room, and theater there for the deaf people. Apparently they have a singing deaf group that performs there and has won awards too. I was quite impressed actually by their auditorium. I must tell you though about the bathrooms we did see in the club... in the ladies room, you walked in and there were 2 sinks inside the door. Then you walked into the toilet room - except there were NO toilets. There were only 3 or 4 holes in the floor - you just squatted over a hole to go to the bathroom. There was no toilet paper, and there were no doors on the "stalls" for each toilet. The smell was bad too. Krystina went in to the bathroom with me and told me that the bathrooms at her school were the same as these. Unbelievable... These bathrooms make port-a-pots in America look like luxuries!! Before we left the deaf facility, I was able to pull aside the one mother who had us in her home and give her $20. She was so incredibly grateful - hugged me, kissed me, etc. I mentioned her reaction to one of the other ladies here with us on the trip from America, and she said that $20 is probably more money than that woman receives in one month on her government stipend.
Two other things we learned - if a deaf adult in Belarus wears a hearing aid, they cannot receive government assistance at all, so most of the deaf people here do not wear hearing aids. Also, we learned that if a woman "registers" her marriage with the government here, she does not get as much government support as a deaf person as she does if she is not "registered" as married. That reminded me in many ways of the welfare system in America actually, but many of these deaf people have absolutely no opportunities here to survive except through the government stipend each month.
After leaving the deaf village we met Irena, our one chaperone with our group this past summer, and Pasha & his mother (one of the children who came to Frederick last summer). We all went bowling and had a nice time with them. Bowling in Belarus is very similar to bowling in America. After bowling, Irena took Rich, Krystina & Olya to go shopping more (Rich was so excited about that!! haha) and Joe, Marharyta, little Krystina & I went with Pasha & his mother to visit her office. His mother is a dentist and works for a state run clinic. We walked to her office, which was quite a good distance - I would guess we walked for at least a 1/2 hour, and it was absolutely freezing. I'm pretty sure it was below zero degrees. So cold it hurt when you breathed through your nose. Anyway, we arrived at her dentist office, and it was so busy with people. Long lines waiting for the government healthcare there. She took us up to her office and showed us her dental area. Looked fairly similar to American dentist offices, although a little bit more sparse. I don't believe she had the advanced equipment as we have in America. She was such a sweet lady, and cleaned both Krystina & Marharyta's teeth while we were there. Then she called a taxi for us and took us back to the ARK house. Dinner was good - we had crepes with dried fruit and cream cheese inside! That evening we played with the girls some. I french braided all the girls hair (except Marharyta who didn't want it done!), and then we tucked all the girls into nice warm soft beds for the evening. We did a bible story then told them good night. We tried very hard while the girls were with us to impress upon them about trusting in God and believing that anything is possible with Him.
The next day - Jan. 5th - we got up early as we were taking a trip to the Cherikof shelter that day. I really enjoyed visiting this shelter - it's probably been one of my favorite things about this trip! We left on the bus around 9:45 am. Breakfast that morning was rice, chicken, carrots/onion/garlic mixture, cinnamon bread & cream cheese with raisins. We had an approximate ride of 1 1/2 hours to Cherikof on a bus.
A shelter is different from an orphanage. Initially when a child is removed by the government from their parents' home in Belarus, they are put in a temporary housing situation for a short time. Then the child is moved to a shelter where they stay for 6 months to 1 year. During this time, the parents have the opportunity to "straighten up" their lifestyle so the child can go back home or the social workers look for another relative to take the child. If neither of these options work out, then the child is moved to an orphanage.
The bus ride to Cherikof itself was interesting - on the way there, Marharyta got car sick and threw up. Fortunately, we knew she wasn't feeling well, and another woman on the bus had given her a plastic bag. Many of the more experienced ABRO people on the bus with me said it was quite common for the orphans, like Marharyta, to get car sick, because they usually have rarely gone anywhere in the car - they stay at the orphanage all the time.
Cherikof was a good place. They had a decent playground for the children, and the director there seemed to be very sincere and really love the children (that's not always the case with the administration of the orphanages!). I learned that this director has on occasion even taken children who had gotten too old to live in the shelter into her own home to help them get established rather than having them end up out on the street. It's good to know there are people like her here in Belarus helping these children in ways they can also. We were led to a room in the shelter with a very big Christmas tree which sat in the middle of the room. About 20 children came in - almost all were dressed in some type of costume - and they sang songs for us and danced around the tree for us. Then Father Frost (Santa) and his granddaughter, the Ice Princess, arrived. Tradition has it that the children must perform something for Father Frost before he gives them candy, so each child came up to Father Frost, recited a poem, sung a song or even played a piano, before he handed them candy. It was very cute. Cherikof actually had some very young children there also - as young as 3 years old. All the children were precious - to look into their eyes and faces and know that their parents had rejected them or would not provide for these little ones was unbelievable & so sad!! We gave gifts (toys, clothes, & school supplies we collected from people in America) to the children and then had the opportunity to spend some time with them and take some pictures. After the children left, we had an auction of some of the children's artwork amongst the Americans to raise money for the orphanage. The children here are very talented in the creative arts - I've seen beautiful creations in the orphanages, and they all seem very enthusiastic about drawing, painting, etc. After the auction, the director brought more children back into the room who she really wants to find host families for next summer. There was one little boy in the group she brought who was fairly young. He has vision problems and he still believes his mother will be taking him back. The director told us that is not the case however, and he'll probably end up in an orphanage. There were a few sisters who also were young who really needed a host family this summer. Precious little girls. Also there was a slightly older child, who was a very sweet, shy girl. She played the piano very well, and seemed like a wonderful child.
We also met deaf children in Cherikof. One little girl broke our hearts. She wore a hearing aid, but I don't believe it helped her much at all. She didn't know sign language at all and could not speak. She is 7 years old, and has no communication. She comes to Cherikof for school but lives at home with her mother. Her mother was there too, and did not want us to video her daughter because she was ashamed that her daughter was deaf. We were able to take the little girl's picture though. This child desperately needs a host family this summer who can spend a lot of time with her to begin teaching her some communication skills. She's obviously been neglected for a long time and it worries me that she cannot even talk through speech or sign language now at age 7. This is the culture of Belarus - anyone with a handicap can have a serious disadvantage, as is seen with this child. We met 3 or 4 other deaf girls there too whose parents brought them to meet the "Americans who want to help deaf children." We took pictures of them and told them about America. After meeting with the children, we had lunch at the orphanage, and then it was time to say goodbye and head back to Mogilev.
Dinner at the ARK house was pasta and chicken - a good meal. Our girls loved it and ate quite a lot! We let the girls stay up late that night, since it was their last night with us. We played with them, I braided their hair again, and we videoed messages from them to bring back to their host families in America. So cute to see what they wanted to tell their American mommy and daddy! Our poor girls - some of them smelled so badly even after they had taken showers for a few days and were using deodorant we brought them. They live in such bad living conditions, in such horribly smelly places, I think the odor just gets in their skin! After a while, it's a little hard to take the smell, but I love these girls so much, you just hug them and hold them anyway figuring you can endure the smell so they know how much they are loved.
Yesterday, we had to take the girls back to their homes. Olya was the first girl we dropped off. Another ABRO lady met us at a bus station to take her back home. She cried when she left, as Rich and I also did. It's so hard to say goodbye to these kids - especially when you know their homes are so horrendous and such bad living conditions. Then we drove to Msistlval to take back Marharyta & Krystina. While at their orphanage we got to tour the buildings again with the director and we met a few other deaf children we hadn't seen before. We brought more toys with us and left them there for the kids. It was snowing, so we couldn't stay too long, but we did get to see their historical museum, and we learned that the buildings where the orphanage is are hundreds of years old. It is an old monastery. Some of the buildings including the gymnasium have been condemned because they are no longer safe. The dormitory buildings smell very moldy, but they do have some heat. I was told they have about 46 boys and over 50 girls that stay there. One adult supervises the girls floor at night and one adult supervises the boys floor at night. That's it - 2 adults for over 100 children!! Saying goodbye to Marharyta & Krystina was also very hard, but they did well. There were some tears, but they are both very strong girls, and they know how much we love them.
Next we took Rich's Krystina back to Dreben. It was a long drive - it was snowing all day and the roads were getting quite bad. But we made it to her apartment where her foster mom was. Krystina was very upset to have to leave and wanted to stay with us so badly. It was very hard to leave her as we were all so emotional by that point in the late afternoon. When we left the van felt so empty with out the four girls with us. When we arrived back at the ARK house last night, we ate sausage balls wrapped up in some kind of dough and yogurt with dried fruit. It was alright. Rich, Joe & I talked for a long time too.
I've discovered that the Internet here shuts down around 9:55 pm so I'm going to end this email and then start a new one with the rest of the update. That way if I don't complete the second one you'll at least have some information. I hope you are all doing well and taking care of yourselves. Thank you so much for your continued prayers! We can feel your prayers giving us strength and protection on this trip!
Take care,
Elaine
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